time flies

wow. I went through my myspace archives to look for a blog about "good, better, and best [what if fine isn't good enough? what if I want extraordinary?]" I'd written when I first signed up back in 2005 and found a lot more posts than I'd remembered writing. I was actually surprised to see that they were still archived. Apparently I was doing this journaling thing on-line for quite some time. I re-read a lot of them and was quite impressed. :) By impressed, I mean i was kind of taken aback to read how God was working in my life, and how I was responding. Unfortunately, it kind of caused me to wonder "what has happened since then?" I feel so distant from 2005 when the record started...have I grown?

Not that anyone reads this blog even, but if you're interested in reading some of the things I've learned in the last 3 years you might check it out here, although I think you need a myspace account. You might find some of my humor also :D I cleaned up a lot of the superfluous ones.

I'll post one of my favorites here:

the skin horse had lived longer in the nursery than any of the others. He was so old that his brown coat was bald in patches and showed the seams underneath, and most of the hairs in his tail and been pulled out to string bead necklaces. He was so wise, for he had seen a long succession of mechanical toys arrive to boast and swagger, and by-and-by break their mainsprings and pass away and he knew that they were only toys and would never turn into anything wise. for nursery magic is very strange and wonderful, and only those playthings that are old and wise and experienced like the skin horse understand all about it.

"what is Real" asked the rabbit one day when they were lying side by side near the nursery fender, before nana came in to clean the room. "does it mean having things that buzz inside you and a stick-out handle?"

"Real isn't how you are made," said the skin horse. "it's a thing that happens to you. when a child loves you for a long, long time, not just to play with, but REALLY loves you, then you become Real."

"does it hurt?" asked the rabbit.

"sometimes," said the skin horse, for he was always truthful. "when you are Real you don't mind being hurt."

"does it happen all at once like being wound up," he asked, "or bit by bit?"

"it doesn't happen all at once," said the skin horse. "you become. it takes a long time. that's why it doesn't often happen to people who break easily, or have sharp edges, or who have to be carefully kept. generally, by the time you are Real, most of your hair has been loved off, and your eyes drop out, and you get loose in the joints and very shabby. but these things don't matter at all, because once you are Real you can't be ugly, except to people who don't understand.

-the velveteen rabbit